Bank Machine Triumph

For a good time, I recommend bearing down on your local bank machine and plundering all the slips of paper that people have deposited into the garbage or left strewn about after their withdrawals. If you are stealthy enough about it, you should be able to spend a good hour standing around in front of the machine, laughing at the bank balances hovering just a few dollars above zero, or giggling audibly at the balances that are below zero, puzzlingly negative. Sometimes you can even detect a waft of barmy depression left behind by the person who stormed off just moments before in search of money somewhere else, like from that same overly generous relative who just never learns. Be sure to leave your own receipt slip behind in such a way that the next person to use the machine has to look in a furiously jealous rage at the size of your account. For the best effect, try jamming the slip into the bank card slot.

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